This Is Why You're Not Respected

Men must lead.

A few weeks ago, I published one of my most successful articles to date, discussing a few attachments that are making the modern man effeminate.

It was very interesting to see just how many men resonated with it, and I think the reason for that is that most of us know, deep down, that we are not as masculine as our ancestors were, and are desperately looking to develop ourselves as manly men in a time and place that pushes us towards effeminacy.

That got me thinking about all the other struggles young men face today, and motivated me to write this article, and future articles in which I’ll go over specific vices common to modern men, virtues that we need to develop, and pains and struggles we usually face.

Respect is a tricky topic. You don’t want to make your whole life about gaining the respect of others. That opens a direct path to hell, as you’ll betray God constantly and try to gain the approval of men and women who are, at the end of the day, sinful, wicked, and lost, like all of us. Ironically, those who make it their life’s purpose to gain the respect of others will not only fail to accomplish that purpose, but also damn their souls in the process.

Weirdly enough, to gain people’s respect, you need to stop seeking it. I know this might sound a bit confusing, but I trust it’ll become clearer as you read further.

In the Christian faith, respect is something that every person deserves, grounded in the recognition of the inherent dignity of every human being. In practice though, respect isn’t usually freely given or received.

I’ve talked with a lot of young men, and it’s sad how many of them feel overlooked, ignored, and plain disrespected: by themselves, their peers, families, wives or girlfriends, and by an entire society that thrives on emasculating men.

I definitely understand the pain of feeling disrespected. I grew up insecure and sensitive, and it wasn’t easy for me to stand up for myself or set proper boundaries. It was frustrating to say the least, to feel invisible, overlooked, and incapable of being noticed and respected.

By the grace of God, and after years of intentional effort, things have changed drastically for me. The days when I felt tiny, ignored, and disrespected every single day are long gone, and while I know full well there’s always room for improvement in everything we do and in everything we are, I’m very thankful for the position I’m in right now and for the confidence I’ve been able to develop.

But it’s precisely because I know how much of a pain it is to feel disrespected and ignored that I felt compelled to write this article. Beyond the obvious advice —taking care of your appearance, developing your physique, growing financially, etc.—, I want to share with you 3 unspoken reasons why you’re not respected and give you practical advice to change that.

Before I share them with you, I want to reiterate: do not make trying to gain respect from people the main goal of your life. It’s better to please God and lose the esteem of every single person on earth than to try to please a wicked, sinful race like our own and betray God in the process. It is important, however, to become a respectable man, and to live by those virtues and values that allow other virtuous people to trust you, follow you, and listen to you.

The reason I’m writing this article is simply to offer some helpful advice to the readers who have felt or are feeling the pain I once felt as well. I have seen firsthand the darkness that this pain leads to, and how quickly it can consume a man and drive him to madness. Because of that, I think it’s worth offering a few words of advice on how to become a respectable man, to hopefully help some men avoid the pain and despair that feeling invisible often leads to.

Like I mentioned, I’ve identified three main reasons why you might not be getting any respect from yourself or your peers.

So why exactly is it that you’re not respected?