I’m 70 years old, a lifelong Catholic, and educated through law school at traditional Catholic institutions. My dad’s generation set a great example of Catholic manhood. This essay is an excellent summary of the issue, and I’ve lived through this long downward slide so there’s much I could add. But I’ll limit it to this: about 26 years back, Christians in general & Catholics in particular realized that Christian manhood was under attack and needed a boost. Mens groups grew and my parish had a fantastic one. Early on, however, a number of men dropped out (they were in their mid-40s). Why? They thought it was glorifying a macho image whereas Christ was about peace. I suppose they missed, for example, the Gospel account of Christ flipping tables and cleansing the Temple. There is a generation of Catholics who were given feel-good theology, drowned in radical feminist thought, and thereby given no understanding of Catholic manhood. Pure & simply, they must age out and younger generations of boys & men must be taught the full & true beauty encompassed by the Theology of the Body.
Thanks for reading Bob, glad to know that you agree after seeing how it was back then. As you said, it comes down to a great misunderstanding of who and how Christ was as a man: not a weakling, not a doormat, but strong yet kind. I'm hopeful for the future because there's definitely a revival of masculine faith happening in the Church
I’m optimistic as well. We don’t ordain many priests in my Diocese but we’re getting more with truly masculine backgrounds. I also take heart in that more people are paying attention to God’s plan as JPII set forth in the Theology of the Body. Fortes!
There's a problem with older generations starting from the "Greatest" where they were separated from their sons. The Babyboomers then grew up affected by television, and the pattern continued down to the present day, of fathers not guiding their sons, first because they were tired, then because they were busy, and as economics got worse, they became less and less able to do it. Only some men have an active disposition, and just working forty hours a week with ten hours commuting for a corporation and not your own family (you still come how and work for your own family necessarily), is enough to drain the average man so he is a bad influence on his son one way or another. Now, instead of rectifying this, men often think that the younger boys just need to figure it out on their own. That is an artificial cultural item that was propagated by American machines and systems in order to make men not able to understand how their families were being broken. At this late stage, they blame their sons for being lazy and stupid, while their sons look desparately not for an intermitten example of what strength looks like, but for an ever present hand that instructs them in all the details of labor and duty. Most men do not know how to dig a hole anymore. Why? It is more complicated than it seems, and no one has shown them how to do it. The ones who do know how to do it are full of contempt for the ones who don't. Christ flipped tables once, He held lepers and caressed blind men and watched children repeatedly in His ministry. The former is necessary, the latter is necessary more.
I’m a Boomer, my dad commuted a long distance. But on weekends, he was all ours. He taught various sports to my brother and me, encouraged us to try many other outdoor activities including scouting, had us helping with all manner of chores, etc. He was a faithful Catholic and devoted husband. And he was typical of other dads in my town. Your description of the Greatest Generation & Boomers is, respectfully, not fully accurate.
Ah! Sorry, I didn’t communicate clearly. What I was saying is that a father should not have to commute. He should be with his sons on average 7 days a week about 16 hours a day. That was the norm for most of history, and outliers were usually involved in government or some unique specialty. What I am saying is that even the best men could only manage teaching sports, encouraging outdoor activities like scouting, doing little chores, and that is because of an economic system that is extremely unnatural and unique, which peaked in the 1950s, and comes from usury. Usury drains a man of his best energy and time and makes it sterile. Hence, men “work” 9 to 5.
How do you expect a man to provide for his family and community without working? The pre-modern economy you speak of is often romanticized, but what fails to be mentioned is all the death and disease that came with it. We could have stayed in our own bubbles for all eternity to prevent this, but no, Christ told us to go out into the world and show the light to all. This necessitates a growth of community, and with that, an economic growth. Men work to glorify Christ, and this can be done in the modern economy. It is what has given us so many medical innovations and clean water, energy, knowledge of God and his wonders, etc. Men can work and be excellent husbands and fathers. They are not mutually exclusive.
Here let me try this more respectfully. Since I converted to Catholicism, I have seen on one side homesteaders that recognize that the modern economy is garbage for the soul and the family. I have seen on the other side conservatives that recognize that a man has got to participate in the modern economy in order to provide for his family. I think both are true. Where I think we get into problems is when they are divided, and one cuts off the truth of the other. So, the homesteader is correct that we ought to have a better situation, but because he does not listen to the conservative, he fails to find the better solution and gets caught up in traditional skills like butchery or woodworking, and ends up marketing himself to his fellow Catholic to convince others to give him money for things that he does not need but only desires. That is fine, but it has no charity for one’s neighbor. The conservative, on the other hand, is correct that we cannot escape this modern economy, but because he does not listen to the homesteader, he pretends as if it is a good thing that he ought to participate in on its own merits, and this creates cognitive dissonance in his sons and brothers. Really, the truth is that the modern economy is garbage based on massive and unnatural sin, not Original Sin, but the ridiculous and unheard of practice of usury, which is easily resisted with any amount of unity. We do not have to suffer under it. But just taking our neighbors’ money and running off to the woods and not doing anything for our neighbor left behind to work at a coding job and fund our desires, that doesn’t help the Church get Her manhood out of its servitude. The solutions are relative, complex, various, and based on each individual man, but it starts with unity and cooperation, just like the Church has been saying since the ‘70s. Not by obscuring doctrines or acting like women, but by acting like straightforward and upright men like Job, who today would be ignored for complaining too much.
If you will permit me to break this down into bullets and ask you clarifying questions, I would appreciate that. I am very interested in the typical understanding of this problem which you have presented here:
1) What is the meaning of work? What is the meaning of provide for a family? Why do you ask "How do I expect a man to provide without working"?
2) Is death and disease solved in our modern economy? By what means? I have experienced both death and disease very recently. The disease was in a hospital wherein there was also coldness and anxiety.
3) Is the bubble to which you are referring that of the family or of sons? Does being around your sons prevent you from working? Why? Does being around your sons prevent you from showing Christ's light to all? Why? When men stayed in this bubble of which you are speaking, was the faith dying out? Was that a worse situation for the Church, what took place in the pre-modern economy?
God bless you. I will tell you that I think all of these words have been redefined for the purposes of nefarious people that serve the devil, in order to exploit working men.
Any good man will be drawn to the more strict and traditional side of the church. Personally, I go to Traditional Latin Mass. It is here that you see the admirable men that are lacking in the church. Im in Los Angeles and our churches are mainly empty, except for the elderly. The only parish offering the Taditional Latin Mass is, by contrast PACKED. So much so that they have had to add more masses to accommodate the influx of people.
Yeah, I've found that to be the case. There's definitely a strong argument to be made for the TLM in that sense. I've also seen that there's a lot of hunger for more traditional Catholicism, and the rise in TLM attendances are proof of that. I think that's definitely a positive.
the reality is that rituals matter. They are conducted just because they are cute. People go to the TLM and they sense their is true spirituality at play. Logically it doesn’t make sense, because its spirituality is not about physical logic.
I have been asking for years for men to say all this.
We women will sort out our own sex (I am doing my best over here).
But men seem to want authority without responsibility, or maybe just... opting out. Men want to blame women for their loss of authority, which is... not how authority works.
You present the real path forward: men holding other men accountable for servant leadership.
Thank you for this article. I help run St. Joseph mens group for the past 8 years. We are all 30s-50s raising families in NJ. We come from a bunch of different parishes and are all the weird Catholic guy with the big family. I’ve witnessed some guys who came into the group as unsure, timid, feminist-influenced, they've really found their confidence. On the flip side, I've seen some heavily ‘masciline’ guys try to take over and control the group and eventually leave. What I'm saying is, we need the brotherhood, and we need a model. St. Joseph is the model for masculinity that God has ordained for all men. He's the ultimate spiritual father. I would caution not to go too far into the ultra trad world. It's actually what caused feminism in the first place, men mistreating women and abusing their authority. It's a fine line. If we don't follow St. Joseph’s model we could end up right back where we started.
Definitely what needed to be said. I sent this article to my brother who was raised by a very liberal leaning mother. And he responded, "I disagree." I was so perplexed. He doesn't even go to church...
I committed myself to the pursuit of virtue four years ago, and I have found now that there is so much targeted evil from the world, principally in economics. Men are just too tired. They are too tired because they are forced to put an inordinate amount of effort into vain tasks that do not build anything for their family, just to provide basic necessities. They only see their sons in the last hour of the day, and they are tired. Their sons are idle all day as a result. Virtue is pursued well in the mixed life. A Catholic father ought to be producing his own economy in partnership with other Catholic fathers, because that is the bare minimum of what is needed to provide for even one child anymore. Why? Because the arrangement that a allowed men to trade time for money and still fulfill all of his obligations is now gone. Rather than admit then, people are tricked into failing obligations and blaming themselves for it. It is pride, too, to say, "It is my fault, if only I were stronger and more virtuous, I could take care of things on my own."
This is an interesting point for sure and I think you are right. The modern world does not help us at all, that's a fact. But there's still things you could do, like what you mention, and also that's why it's so important for us to sacrifice and fight this cultural and moral war right now so that maybe next generations can live in a world that helps them instead of having to always be swimming against the current.
Yeah you're catching on. I don't think it's so moderate as that makes it sound. It's a war, where the world is trying to make mankind sterile and snuff out any guy that wants to have three children, and the Blessed Mother is making ways behind enemy lines to disintegrate Her enemies. That's what I'm working on. It is very hard. I am discouraged most of the time. Churchmen generally give me less than I give them in every category but contempt.
I have noticed the same problem with men in the Catholic church and some years ago came across what I believe is the missing link really:- check out John Eldredge's book Wild At Heart. I found this a very helpful starting point in the Christian Masculine Journey. Similarly the many retreats/courses the Wild at Heart ministry offers are brilliant as well. You can show them to friends or in your parish and the Holy Spirit will move !
As you rightly point out, in addition to traditional perceptions of masculinity like strength and resolve, there are simple ways to be masculine and upright: attending mass, dressing properly, praying frequently, etc.
Integrated masculinity is beyond the aesthetic and involves penetrating deeper into the Self.
Agree with everything you’re saying except the latter part of this:
“I guarantee that if we all made it our mission to pursue virtue and develop holistically so we could glorify God in everything we did, not only would we save the Church from this great crisis of manhood, but none of us would have any issues finding great women to marry.”
Doing everything you say will not magically create great women to marry in the here and now. It will over time and for the next generation. The current generation of men should do this work but let’s not promise things they won’t get to experience. It’s not speaking to their reality as they see it and experience it now and risks having the whole message fall on deaf ears. They’ll have to sacrifice for the greater good and they likely won’t be able to find the promised great women they hope for as this generation is likely lost. They should still step up though!
Thanks for reading brother, appreciate your comment! I disagree though, I think the great women are already here, and what there is is a great lack of men who can lead them properly. I've seen that in my own experience and in many congregations and with many people who I've talked to. So it's not about great women magically appearing, but about men stepping up to be able to lead the great women who already exist, and who are desperate for good, strong men to court and marry them
I didn’t mean it that literally that there are none. As someone who recently got married I think yes there still are some. To be more precise in my language, there are less of them now than in generations past. The plight of the single man (who is being masculine and stepping up as he should) is worth empathising with. And to make things worse the weak man is also in the way making the challenge harder.
I don’t know if I believe that. I do believe that they’re having a harder time than their fathers and grandfathers did setting up their lives with professions, families and friends. The more specific point on the thread was about women, and yes that part is especially harder these days.
I think the average age of first marriage confirms that. And worse a lot of people aren’t getting married at all. So yes I guess is the answer to your question.
So, yes and no. Yes, we men need to do more, and we can. But no, it won’t be easy: expect a lot of blowback from all sorts and conditions who like things just as they are, thank you. The dimension that needs further development and exploration is meekness — which is not a flaccid softness but rather power under control. This entails all sorts of things and merits another article. But this is a really good and important start.
Thanks, David. It will definitely be a great challenge. And definitely the topic of meekness merits another article, which I'll write if this one performs well and people like it. God bless brother!
I can't remember if this was in your article or somewhere else, but it was talking about giving women sympathy at a time of month, and that same sympathy not being available to men. Well, honestly, if men start practicing chastity, especially if they have been sedated with release for a long period of time, then they will be angry. They should have the same kind of sympathy that women get in that case. It is much better for them to be impure and a little angry than keep sedating themselves. It is similar with children who aren't vaccinated. They are more wild. If you don't put them in front of screens, they are destructive. So old people in church that give you dirty looks because your boys are bouncing around the pews, well that's because they don't know what children really are like, ebcause they have been sedated for fifty years at least. Same with a man. He yells once, and everyone acts like he has this huge problem. No, he's just a man. That's how men are. Once pornography is gone, you will hear more yelling. The Irish had the home for gentleness, the church for working things out with nieghbors, and the bar for fighting things out with men.
LOL, I get what you mean. The Eastern Orthodox side doesn't suffer this masculinity crisis. I think its definitely a crisis in the West. This in and of itself should be explored. I think you should write about this.
I don't think you got everything right in this article but this was a great line "A man is always leading, whether he wants to or not. Where will you lead your people?"
We forget that even if we abandon our responsibilities as men, we will still be... responsible for them. And leadership is the quality so many men in the church today shy away from, because it comes with uncertain outcomes and consequences.
I’m 70 years old, a lifelong Catholic, and educated through law school at traditional Catholic institutions. My dad’s generation set a great example of Catholic manhood. This essay is an excellent summary of the issue, and I’ve lived through this long downward slide so there’s much I could add. But I’ll limit it to this: about 26 years back, Christians in general & Catholics in particular realized that Christian manhood was under attack and needed a boost. Mens groups grew and my parish had a fantastic one. Early on, however, a number of men dropped out (they were in their mid-40s). Why? They thought it was glorifying a macho image whereas Christ was about peace. I suppose they missed, for example, the Gospel account of Christ flipping tables and cleansing the Temple. There is a generation of Catholics who were given feel-good theology, drowned in radical feminist thought, and thereby given no understanding of Catholic manhood. Pure & simply, they must age out and younger generations of boys & men must be taught the full & true beauty encompassed by the Theology of the Body.
Thanks for reading Bob, glad to know that you agree after seeing how it was back then. As you said, it comes down to a great misunderstanding of who and how Christ was as a man: not a weakling, not a doormat, but strong yet kind. I'm hopeful for the future because there's definitely a revival of masculine faith happening in the Church
I’m optimistic as well. We don’t ordain many priests in my Diocese but we’re getting more with truly masculine backgrounds. I also take heart in that more people are paying attention to God’s plan as JPII set forth in the Theology of the Body. Fortes!
There's a problem with older generations starting from the "Greatest" where they were separated from their sons. The Babyboomers then grew up affected by television, and the pattern continued down to the present day, of fathers not guiding their sons, first because they were tired, then because they were busy, and as economics got worse, they became less and less able to do it. Only some men have an active disposition, and just working forty hours a week with ten hours commuting for a corporation and not your own family (you still come how and work for your own family necessarily), is enough to drain the average man so he is a bad influence on his son one way or another. Now, instead of rectifying this, men often think that the younger boys just need to figure it out on their own. That is an artificial cultural item that was propagated by American machines and systems in order to make men not able to understand how their families were being broken. At this late stage, they blame their sons for being lazy and stupid, while their sons look desparately not for an intermitten example of what strength looks like, but for an ever present hand that instructs them in all the details of labor and duty. Most men do not know how to dig a hole anymore. Why? It is more complicated than it seems, and no one has shown them how to do it. The ones who do know how to do it are full of contempt for the ones who don't. Christ flipped tables once, He held lepers and caressed blind men and watched children repeatedly in His ministry. The former is necessary, the latter is necessary more.
I’m a Boomer, my dad commuted a long distance. But on weekends, he was all ours. He taught various sports to my brother and me, encouraged us to try many other outdoor activities including scouting, had us helping with all manner of chores, etc. He was a faithful Catholic and devoted husband. And he was typical of other dads in my town. Your description of the Greatest Generation & Boomers is, respectfully, not fully accurate.
Ah! Sorry, I didn’t communicate clearly. What I was saying is that a father should not have to commute. He should be with his sons on average 7 days a week about 16 hours a day. That was the norm for most of history, and outliers were usually involved in government or some unique specialty. What I am saying is that even the best men could only manage teaching sports, encouraging outdoor activities like scouting, doing little chores, and that is because of an economic system that is extremely unnatural and unique, which peaked in the 1950s, and comes from usury. Usury drains a man of his best energy and time and makes it sterile. Hence, men “work” 9 to 5.
How do you expect a man to provide for his family and community without working? The pre-modern economy you speak of is often romanticized, but what fails to be mentioned is all the death and disease that came with it. We could have stayed in our own bubbles for all eternity to prevent this, but no, Christ told us to go out into the world and show the light to all. This necessitates a growth of community, and with that, an economic growth. Men work to glorify Christ, and this can be done in the modern economy. It is what has given us so many medical innovations and clean water, energy, knowledge of God and his wonders, etc. Men can work and be excellent husbands and fathers. They are not mutually exclusive.
Here let me try this more respectfully. Since I converted to Catholicism, I have seen on one side homesteaders that recognize that the modern economy is garbage for the soul and the family. I have seen on the other side conservatives that recognize that a man has got to participate in the modern economy in order to provide for his family. I think both are true. Where I think we get into problems is when they are divided, and one cuts off the truth of the other. So, the homesteader is correct that we ought to have a better situation, but because he does not listen to the conservative, he fails to find the better solution and gets caught up in traditional skills like butchery or woodworking, and ends up marketing himself to his fellow Catholic to convince others to give him money for things that he does not need but only desires. That is fine, but it has no charity for one’s neighbor. The conservative, on the other hand, is correct that we cannot escape this modern economy, but because he does not listen to the homesteader, he pretends as if it is a good thing that he ought to participate in on its own merits, and this creates cognitive dissonance in his sons and brothers. Really, the truth is that the modern economy is garbage based on massive and unnatural sin, not Original Sin, but the ridiculous and unheard of practice of usury, which is easily resisted with any amount of unity. We do not have to suffer under it. But just taking our neighbors’ money and running off to the woods and not doing anything for our neighbor left behind to work at a coding job and fund our desires, that doesn’t help the Church get Her manhood out of its servitude. The solutions are relative, complex, various, and based on each individual man, but it starts with unity and cooperation, just like the Church has been saying since the ‘70s. Not by obscuring doctrines or acting like women, but by acting like straightforward and upright men like Job, who today would be ignored for complaining too much.
If you will permit me to break this down into bullets and ask you clarifying questions, I would appreciate that. I am very interested in the typical understanding of this problem which you have presented here:
1) What is the meaning of work? What is the meaning of provide for a family? Why do you ask "How do I expect a man to provide without working"?
2) Is death and disease solved in our modern economy? By what means? I have experienced both death and disease very recently. The disease was in a hospital wherein there was also coldness and anxiety.
3) Is the bubble to which you are referring that of the family or of sons? Does being around your sons prevent you from working? Why? Does being around your sons prevent you from showing Christ's light to all? Why? When men stayed in this bubble of which you are speaking, was the faith dying out? Was that a worse situation for the Church, what took place in the pre-modern economy?
God bless you. I will tell you that I think all of these words have been redefined for the purposes of nefarious people that serve the devil, in order to exploit working men.
Any good man will be drawn to the more strict and traditional side of the church. Personally, I go to Traditional Latin Mass. It is here that you see the admirable men that are lacking in the church. Im in Los Angeles and our churches are mainly empty, except for the elderly. The only parish offering the Taditional Latin Mass is, by contrast PACKED. So much so that they have had to add more masses to accommodate the influx of people.
Yeah, I've found that to be the case. There's definitely a strong argument to be made for the TLM in that sense. I've also seen that there's a lot of hunger for more traditional Catholicism, and the rise in TLM attendances are proof of that. I think that's definitely a positive.
the reality is that rituals matter. They are conducted just because they are cute. People go to the TLM and they sense their is true spirituality at play. Logically it doesn’t make sense, because its spirituality is not about physical logic.
THANK YOU!!
I have been asking for years for men to say all this.
We women will sort out our own sex (I am doing my best over here).
But men seem to want authority without responsibility, or maybe just... opting out. Men want to blame women for their loss of authority, which is... not how authority works.
You present the real path forward: men holding other men accountable for servant leadership.
You are exactly right.
Thank you for this article. I help run St. Joseph mens group for the past 8 years. We are all 30s-50s raising families in NJ. We come from a bunch of different parishes and are all the weird Catholic guy with the big family. I’ve witnessed some guys who came into the group as unsure, timid, feminist-influenced, they've really found their confidence. On the flip side, I've seen some heavily ‘masciline’ guys try to take over and control the group and eventually leave. What I'm saying is, we need the brotherhood, and we need a model. St. Joseph is the model for masculinity that God has ordained for all men. He's the ultimate spiritual father. I would caution not to go too far into the ultra trad world. It's actually what caused feminism in the first place, men mistreating women and abusing their authority. It's a fine line. If we don't follow St. Joseph’s model we could end up right back where we started.
Love it brother. Don’t back down, men are called to excellence in every domain and that requires sacrifice, boldness and intention.
Definitely what needed to be said. I sent this article to my brother who was raised by a very liberal leaning mother. And he responded, "I disagree." I was so perplexed. He doesn't even go to church...
Absolutely. As an Orthodox myself, I recommend you to listen to Father Seraphim Rose's intervention on forming the soul :
https://youtu.be/8_9AN8qn0Og?si=0szNBKarI3Fa-hs9
Thanks brother, 👊🏻💪🏻
I committed myself to the pursuit of virtue four years ago, and I have found now that there is so much targeted evil from the world, principally in economics. Men are just too tired. They are too tired because they are forced to put an inordinate amount of effort into vain tasks that do not build anything for their family, just to provide basic necessities. They only see their sons in the last hour of the day, and they are tired. Their sons are idle all day as a result. Virtue is pursued well in the mixed life. A Catholic father ought to be producing his own economy in partnership with other Catholic fathers, because that is the bare minimum of what is needed to provide for even one child anymore. Why? Because the arrangement that a allowed men to trade time for money and still fulfill all of his obligations is now gone. Rather than admit then, people are tricked into failing obligations and blaming themselves for it. It is pride, too, to say, "It is my fault, if only I were stronger and more virtuous, I could take care of things on my own."
This is an interesting point for sure and I think you are right. The modern world does not help us at all, that's a fact. But there's still things you could do, like what you mention, and also that's why it's so important for us to sacrifice and fight this cultural and moral war right now so that maybe next generations can live in a world that helps them instead of having to always be swimming against the current.
Yeah you're catching on. I don't think it's so moderate as that makes it sound. It's a war, where the world is trying to make mankind sterile and snuff out any guy that wants to have three children, and the Blessed Mother is making ways behind enemy lines to disintegrate Her enemies. That's what I'm working on. It is very hard. I am discouraged most of the time. Churchmen generally give me less than I give them in every category but contempt.
I have noticed the same problem with men in the Catholic church and some years ago came across what I believe is the missing link really:- check out John Eldredge's book Wild At Heart. I found this a very helpful starting point in the Christian Masculine Journey. Similarly the many retreats/courses the Wild at Heart ministry offers are brilliant as well. You can show them to friends or in your parish and the Holy Spirit will move !
As you rightly point out, in addition to traditional perceptions of masculinity like strength and resolve, there are simple ways to be masculine and upright: attending mass, dressing properly, praying frequently, etc.
Integrated masculinity is beyond the aesthetic and involves penetrating deeper into the Self.
I covered this in relation to Samson--a Biblical hero whose strengths and weaknesses Catholic men have much to learn from: https://thomasobrien.substack.com/p/toxic-masculinity-and-lion-slayers
Great work, Juan.
Thanks brother! Appreciate the support 💪🏻
Yes! Thank you. Being Christ-like means having the love and courage to lay down one's life for one's faith and friends. Well said 🫡 carry on
Amen brother, thank you for reading 🙏🏼🔥
Agree with everything you’re saying except the latter part of this:
“I guarantee that if we all made it our mission to pursue virtue and develop holistically so we could glorify God in everything we did, not only would we save the Church from this great crisis of manhood, but none of us would have any issues finding great women to marry.”
Doing everything you say will not magically create great women to marry in the here and now. It will over time and for the next generation. The current generation of men should do this work but let’s not promise things they won’t get to experience. It’s not speaking to their reality as they see it and experience it now and risks having the whole message fall on deaf ears. They’ll have to sacrifice for the greater good and they likely won’t be able to find the promised great women they hope for as this generation is likely lost. They should still step up though!
Thanks for reading brother, appreciate your comment! I disagree though, I think the great women are already here, and what there is is a great lack of men who can lead them properly. I've seen that in my own experience and in many congregations and with many people who I've talked to. So it's not about great women magically appearing, but about men stepping up to be able to lead the great women who already exist, and who are desperate for good, strong men to court and marry them
I didn’t mean it that literally that there are none. As someone who recently got married I think yes there still are some. To be more precise in my language, there are less of them now than in generations past. The plight of the single man (who is being masculine and stepping up as he should) is worth empathising with. And to make things worse the weak man is also in the way making the challenge harder.
So you believe that most men will never marry?
I don’t know if I believe that. I do believe that they’re having a harder time than their fathers and grandfathers did setting up their lives with professions, families and friends. The more specific point on the thread was about women, and yes that part is especially harder these days.
Do you think that most men will just end up marrying much later than before? Like mid 30s marrying younger women?
I think the average age of first marriage confirms that. And worse a lot of people aren’t getting married at all. So yes I guess is the answer to your question.
What do you think about all this?
First marriage? It should be the only marriage. Do you think it’s possible gen z men in their 30s could marry women in their 20s?
Yes
So, yes and no. Yes, we men need to do more, and we can. But no, it won’t be easy: expect a lot of blowback from all sorts and conditions who like things just as they are, thank you. The dimension that needs further development and exploration is meekness — which is not a flaccid softness but rather power under control. This entails all sorts of things and merits another article. But this is a really good and important start.
Thanks, David. It will definitely be a great challenge. And definitely the topic of meekness merits another article, which I'll write if this one performs well and people like it. God bless brother!
I can't remember if this was in your article or somewhere else, but it was talking about giving women sympathy at a time of month, and that same sympathy not being available to men. Well, honestly, if men start practicing chastity, especially if they have been sedated with release for a long period of time, then they will be angry. They should have the same kind of sympathy that women get in that case. It is much better for them to be impure and a little angry than keep sedating themselves. It is similar with children who aren't vaccinated. They are more wild. If you don't put them in front of screens, they are destructive. So old people in church that give you dirty looks because your boys are bouncing around the pews, well that's because they don't know what children really are like, ebcause they have been sedated for fifty years at least. Same with a man. He yells once, and everyone acts like he has this huge problem. No, he's just a man. That's how men are. Once pornography is gone, you will hear more yelling. The Irish had the home for gentleness, the church for working things out with nieghbors, and the bar for fighting things out with men.
All of you are gay except me
If that’s the spirit in which you think I wrote the article it’s just wrong. I speak about “we” in almost every statement
LOL, I get what you mean. The Eastern Orthodox side doesn't suffer this masculinity crisis. I think its definitely a crisis in the West. This in and of itself should be explored. I think you should write about this.
Great article!
Thanks Josué! Glad you enjoyed it brother
I don't think you got everything right in this article but this was a great line "A man is always leading, whether he wants to or not. Where will you lead your people?"
We forget that even if we abandon our responsibilities as men, we will still be... responsible for them. And leadership is the quality so many men in the church today shy away from, because it comes with uncertain outcomes and consequences.