We've recently partnered up with Relay, a Christian men's health app specializing in helping men overcome p*rn addiction through Christian principles and evidence-based psychological practices. As a reader of Ad Aeternum, you can try it out for free by downloading the app here and using the code AETERNUM: https://joinrelay.app/adaeternum
this is the best article I’ve seen on this topic. The only other thing that I would really stress is learning to redirect your energy to other things. It’s a lot easier to fall into this sin when you aren’t keeping yourself busy with something. When you aren’t doing the things you know you should be, the temptation will creep in because you aren’t directing the energy towards fulfilling righteous tasks. There is almost never an instance where the temptation will arise when you’ve done all that you should be doing throughout the day.
Thank you brother!! Really appreciate that. And I agree 100%, I should've probably added that too, or expanded on the last step, in which I mention you should stay busy 👊🏻
A quality book that may help those who are in the fight or looking for further help is Andrew Williams' 'From Object to Icon: The Struggle for Vision in a Pornographic World'. Williams' thesis is that we can address the deeper and spiritual cause of porn consumption by shifting one's view of people: To go from seeing them as objects of lust and fantasy to seeing them as beloved icons (image) of God. He offers a clear and developed view from an Eastern Orthodox Christian perspective.
Thanks for the recommendation brother. I think that's also a key mindset shift that helps quit. Seeing others as also made in the image of God. Appreciate the advice, it definitely complements the protocol 👊🏻
That's it, you need to direct that energy towards more productive endeavors. My pleasure brother, as mentioned, I have a genuine interest in helping men quit this. Won't ever ask for money for anything related to this topic!
Appreciate you taking the time to address what is now the most widespread addiction amongst men. Really well written and the content is needed.
Although I’m a Protestant Christian, the recommendations you made from a Catholic perspective resonate, have their analog across denominations and hey, we’re all Gods children, so it’s good manna.
Because porn is an addiction, getting a girlfriend a wife or having a family will not prevent or stop the addiction. Those are outside influences and addiction is from the inside of us. How many men do we know that sneak a drink or smoke? Porn is no different.
The other thing I’ll mention is it will never easier to quit than NOW. The more images we stack inside our powerful minds, more it will work against us to relapse. Your recommends on getting temptations out of the way are so valuable there.
Lastly, just want to reiterate that getting an accountability partner who is not your girlfriend or wife is key. Women can’t comprehend fully the addiction and we need a bother to talk truth and hold us truly accountable.
Thanks for the kind words and support my brother in Christ!
I absolutely agree with your recommendations too, and furthermore I think this addiction should ideally be fixed BEFORE one marries. It’s very much a risk to enter into a relationship while addicted to p*rn, you’ll probably just end up harming your marriage and spouse. And having men to talk to and support you while going through the cleansing process is key. Thanks for reading brother, God bless you!
The best method that I have found helps people quit porn is the “ easy peasy method “. It's free and you can listen to the audio book on YouTube or read the pdf file online. It's the only way that truly helped me get rid of it.
I'm preparing for marriage this year and I cannot overemphasize how much pornography has hindered my ability to love my fiancé well. It has been a battle since I was 8 years old and it's something that I've overcome by degrees. I'm 22 now.
I recommend reading "In Defense of Purity" by Dietrich Von Hildebrand and his book "The Sacred Heart". These have been invaluable in helping me see how porn has stifled my ability to be tender and attentive to the emotions of women and how sin hardens our hearts and blinds us to truth, beauty and goodness.
Thanks Simple Man for putting this together. I need the reminder from time to time not to look back, like Lots wife.
God is with you brother! Whatever you do, don’t lose hope. Thanks for the book recommendation and for reading and supporting. Will keep you in my prayers!
One good method to get rid of this is to get married and have as many kids as you can. As soon as that happens, your time is directed towards others and leaves no space.
Also might help, but sadly not enough IMO. Many men stay addicted to p*rn well into marriage and fatherhood, which just completely destroys their marriage.
Another important principle I’ve come to discover is the principle of mastery of oneself, but in the specific area of technology. Technology used to be a tool. We would only take out a hammer when there was a use.
However, in the modern age, technology has evolved to where we have the equivalent to a Swiss Army knife in our pockets, yet more useful. We can do everything on our phones from social media, calling, texting, FaceTiming, video games, YouTube, Substack, and adult content. We use technology for everything, and it’s become our masters.
Many of us average way too many hours on our phones if we are honest. Many of use find an escape. We train our minds to escape everyday. Yet we wonder why people use adult content as an escape when we train ourselves to escape everyday? Many people want to escape reality in some sense. But, I say we need to get rid of the master that leads us to sin and face life.
I got this program called Shift. There’s a website called shift your phone where you can download this software that can get rid of distractions on your phone. The same creator is even making a free version that gets rid of any ability to watch adult content.
The only Master we should have is God, and God gave us the Holy Spirit to empower us to remove the vices in our lives. Stop letting these vices rule you. Let God and daily devotion and prayer rule your life
Excellent post. What I would say is that, although blockers and trying to thwart social media algorithms is good and helpful to do, I think it has to be more extreme, at least for me. Lust is very powerful, and if you have blockers, there are ways to get around them. The App Store is overflowing with pornographic apps, and ai chat bots aren’t typically blocked by filters. For me, I recently ordered a wisephone, which is a phone without an internet browser, and only allows useful apps like banking apps ect. I tried the blocker route, but it just never worked completely. P0rn, whether soft or hard, is everywhere nowadays, and that includes places where it really shouldn’t be.
Great post! The most important thing you didn’t add though is for men to actively go out and look for a girlfriend/wife. Learn how to socialize, put yourselves out there, flirt, start viewing women as potential and desirable mates instead of she-bros.
Yeah that's true but I do believe that should come after at least making a firm decision to quit and some progress in that direction. So many men think getting a wife will fix their p*rn problem and then end up wrecking their relationship when they realize that isn't the case.
This is hands down the best article I've encountered on Substack. Truly an insight that I needed to hear. Glory to God I got to see this and pray for me !
Doing everything I can to give this post more reach. One of the most effective tools in this struggle is exactly the first tool you mention. It's also worthwhile to remember how utterly fake porn is. Our attachment to it nowadays is, almost always, an attachment to getting off to a screen. A *screen*. A bunch of flat, glowing pixels. We're meant for so much more, but getting there means realizing how shallow, evil, and utterly *totally* worthless porn is. God bless sir.
Thanks for reading and for sharing the article brother, really glad you think it's useful. I definitely agree with you, just being very aware of how humiliating such a habit is was a probably the most helpful tool to help me quit.
We've recently partnered up with Relay, a Christian men's health app specializing in helping men overcome p*rn addiction through Christian principles and evidence-based psychological practices. As a reader of Ad Aeternum, you can try it out for free by downloading the app here and using the code AETERNUM: https://joinrelay.app/adaeternum
this is the best article I’ve seen on this topic. The only other thing that I would really stress is learning to redirect your energy to other things. It’s a lot easier to fall into this sin when you aren’t keeping yourself busy with something. When you aren’t doing the things you know you should be, the temptation will creep in because you aren’t directing the energy towards fulfilling righteous tasks. There is almost never an instance where the temptation will arise when you’ve done all that you should be doing throughout the day.
Thank you brother!! Really appreciate that. And I agree 100%, I should've probably added that too, or expanded on the last step, in which I mention you should stay busy 👊🏻
A quality book that may help those who are in the fight or looking for further help is Andrew Williams' 'From Object to Icon: The Struggle for Vision in a Pornographic World'. Williams' thesis is that we can address the deeper and spiritual cause of porn consumption by shifting one's view of people: To go from seeing them as objects of lust and fantasy to seeing them as beloved icons (image) of God. He offers a clear and developed view from an Eastern Orthodox Christian perspective.
Thanks for the recommendation brother. I think that's also a key mindset shift that helps quit. Seeing others as also made in the image of God. Appreciate the advice, it definitely complements the protocol 👊🏻
My advice is, as in previous comment, to always be busy, spiritually, mentally and physically.
When I am not working, I am either learning or working on my side business, toward achieving a full online income and replacing my normal job.
Also, big respect to Simple Man for keeping this free and not asking for $$$$ .
That's it, you need to direct that energy towards more productive endeavors. My pleasure brother, as mentioned, I have a genuine interest in helping men quit this. Won't ever ask for money for anything related to this topic!
Appreciate you taking the time to address what is now the most widespread addiction amongst men. Really well written and the content is needed.
Although I’m a Protestant Christian, the recommendations you made from a Catholic perspective resonate, have their analog across denominations and hey, we’re all Gods children, so it’s good manna.
Because porn is an addiction, getting a girlfriend a wife or having a family will not prevent or stop the addiction. Those are outside influences and addiction is from the inside of us. How many men do we know that sneak a drink or smoke? Porn is no different.
The other thing I’ll mention is it will never easier to quit than NOW. The more images we stack inside our powerful minds, more it will work against us to relapse. Your recommends on getting temptations out of the way are so valuable there.
Lastly, just want to reiterate that getting an accountability partner who is not your girlfriend or wife is key. Women can’t comprehend fully the addiction and we need a bother to talk truth and hold us truly accountable.
Thank you again for this. Be blessed. ✌🏼
Thanks for the kind words and support my brother in Christ!
I absolutely agree with your recommendations too, and furthermore I think this addiction should ideally be fixed BEFORE one marries. It’s very much a risk to enter into a relationship while addicted to p*rn, you’ll probably just end up harming your marriage and spouse. And having men to talk to and support you while going through the cleansing process is key. Thanks for reading brother, God bless you!
That’s right on. Best to crush that demon beforehand. Thank you again for your content. Merry Christmas!
The best method that I have found helps people quit porn is the “ easy peasy method “. It's free and you can listen to the audio book on YouTube or read the pdf file online. It's the only way that truly helped me get rid of it.
Hadn't heard of it but thank you for sharing it!
It's been two weeks since I came across this comment and read the book. It's still early, but thank you. Thank you so so much.
I'm preparing for marriage this year and I cannot overemphasize how much pornography has hindered my ability to love my fiancé well. It has been a battle since I was 8 years old and it's something that I've overcome by degrees. I'm 22 now.
I recommend reading "In Defense of Purity" by Dietrich Von Hildebrand and his book "The Sacred Heart". These have been invaluable in helping me see how porn has stifled my ability to be tender and attentive to the emotions of women and how sin hardens our hearts and blinds us to truth, beauty and goodness.
Thanks Simple Man for putting this together. I need the reminder from time to time not to look back, like Lots wife.
Please pray for me, brothers!
God is with you brother! Whatever you do, don’t lose hope. Thanks for the book recommendation and for reading and supporting. Will keep you in my prayers!
One good method to get rid of this is to get married and have as many kids as you can. As soon as that happens, your time is directed towards others and leaves no space.
Also might help, but sadly not enough IMO. Many men stay addicted to p*rn well into marriage and fatherhood, which just completely destroys their marriage.
A profoundly excellent article. I'm definitely referring to to someone I know who've I've started helping along the anti-pornography path. Well done!
Glad you liked it brother, and please feel free to share it with anyone whom yuo think might benefit from it! God bless you
Another important principle I’ve come to discover is the principle of mastery of oneself, but in the specific area of technology. Technology used to be a tool. We would only take out a hammer when there was a use.
However, in the modern age, technology has evolved to where we have the equivalent to a Swiss Army knife in our pockets, yet more useful. We can do everything on our phones from social media, calling, texting, FaceTiming, video games, YouTube, Substack, and adult content. We use technology for everything, and it’s become our masters.
Many of us average way too many hours on our phones if we are honest. Many of use find an escape. We train our minds to escape everyday. Yet we wonder why people use adult content as an escape when we train ourselves to escape everyday? Many people want to escape reality in some sense. But, I say we need to get rid of the master that leads us to sin and face life.
I got this program called Shift. There’s a website called shift your phone where you can download this software that can get rid of distractions on your phone. The same creator is even making a free version that gets rid of any ability to watch adult content.
The only Master we should have is God, and God gave us the Holy Spirit to empower us to remove the vices in our lives. Stop letting these vices rule you. Let God and daily devotion and prayer rule your life
Excellent post. What I would say is that, although blockers and trying to thwart social media algorithms is good and helpful to do, I think it has to be more extreme, at least for me. Lust is very powerful, and if you have blockers, there are ways to get around them. The App Store is overflowing with pornographic apps, and ai chat bots aren’t typically blocked by filters. For me, I recently ordered a wisephone, which is a phone without an internet browser, and only allows useful apps like banking apps ect. I tried the blocker route, but it just never worked completely. P0rn, whether soft or hard, is everywhere nowadays, and that includes places where it really shouldn’t be.
Great post! The most important thing you didn’t add though is for men to actively go out and look for a girlfriend/wife. Learn how to socialize, put yourselves out there, flirt, start viewing women as potential and desirable mates instead of she-bros.
Yeah that's true but I do believe that should come after at least making a firm decision to quit and some progress in that direction. So many men think getting a wife will fix their p*rn problem and then end up wrecking their relationship when they realize that isn't the case.
Agreed.
This is hands down the best article I've encountered on Substack. Truly an insight that I needed to hear. Glory to God I got to see this and pray for me !
Really glad to hear that brother, hope it's useful on your journey. Many blessings and I'll definitely have you in my prayers!
Doing everything I can to give this post more reach. One of the most effective tools in this struggle is exactly the first tool you mention. It's also worthwhile to remember how utterly fake porn is. Our attachment to it nowadays is, almost always, an attachment to getting off to a screen. A *screen*. A bunch of flat, glowing pixels. We're meant for so much more, but getting there means realizing how shallow, evil, and utterly *totally* worthless porn is. God bless sir.
Thanks for reading and for sharing the article brother, really glad you think it's useful. I definitely agree with you, just being very aware of how humiliating such a habit is was a probably the most helpful tool to help me quit.
It warms my heart to think of you men out there, fighting the power of that serpent. You can do it!
Thank you Maria! 🙏🏼
This is amazing.
Thanks!