Perfectionism is that ever constant whisper in the back of every creator’s mind, constantly judging the finished product. I’ve been a civil contractor for my entire adult life and can still identify every flaw in my work while hearing nothing but praise from the customer. It’s a curse or a blessing depending on your point of view but it’s always there. Enough is enough, indeed. Great article.
Definitely both a blessing and a curse. Whenever I catch myself being overly perfectionist I remind myself of a saying of my father: “Dumb, bold and decisive beats smart and indecisive.” And just commit to finishing and putting it out there, even if I’m not 100% satisfied with the end product (I don’t think you’ll ever be 100% satisfied)
Excellent post. I read it twice. All I would add is perfectionism is always based in shame, not the urge to make something perfect. As you summed up at the end, your perfectionism is rationalizing fear. It is overcoming the fear we must work on.
Incidentally I am writing here on Substack precisely to improve this great failing of mine. I am forcing myself to publish regularly. It helps.
Glad you enjoyed the post brother, and thanks for reading. Just subscribed to your publication, keep up the great work!
Agree on the shame thing, one thing that also helps me to defeat shame is to remember that if something is done with purity of intention (which is why I aim to do), it’s highly likely that it will in fact be valuable to someone else, and in that case it’s only right to share it.
Good advice and I would add, don’t give up. Giving up is sure failure, whether spending too much time perfecting or not. All that can be adjusted. Knowing when to move on is important. Perfection is impossible as everything man creates at any stage can always be “perfected”. The journey, if not soul satisfying, should be altered to achieve a soul satisfying experience. Then when the nudge is felt to move on, it can be done with peace knowing man’s perfection is unachievable. We are not gods.
Ok, i had a bit of trouble with this, and my solution was thus. Perfection is a dead concept, Life IS change. one can observe this all round, the light and time passes. nothing living in time can be perfect as perfection is fixed. it is the ultimate expression of that concept, it is the end, the fulfillment. So a painting, might be perfectly executed, but all my creations are shown to me complete. yet time continues in our perception. basically i threw out perfection as a dead concept and replaced it with a more useful one, a flow of life expression, a vibrancy of moment, of communication love and joy. I do sometimes wait and re write things, if i find an image or a better turn of phrase. But i do not share them with the world, because , i wrote them for me. I think most people are uninterested. my family will enjoy them, i know. I do the same with photo albums. I have a bunch of books actually. not keen on publishing them.
Of course, if you’re not interested in publishing them, then they are finished when they are just written in their entirety. Depends completely on what your intention for your own project is. i like what you said about perfection! Thank you for reading, appreciate it a lot!
Mmm. I have re written several. I am writing for posterity. for my descendants. i will re write them again, especially my herb books, because i want to include greater depth. I have started to put them in poetic form bit by bit, so that it will be harder to edit. like the kallevala or the vedas. i write a poen about every herb with relevant information, and each time is grows more comprehensive and more accurate. unless someone is very skilled, no one will easily corrupt the information and it will be easy to remember for a thousand generations. It is, long term thinking as opposed to what most of us are conditions to settle with. I know my drawings are no longer that of a great master, (i am getting old) but my poetry could outlast the memory of me.
Very encouraging, and just the kick-in-the-pants that I need. Thanks, Simple Man. You're far more complex than your monicker lets on!
PS I'm enjoying your book, "Christian Vitality". I've had this anecdote to share for weeks now, the remembrance of which you inspired, so never mind planning to post it, here it is for all the world to enjoy:
You make the point that churches can rob a man of his masculinity by not promoting strength of character. Spot on. In my tale, a relative - let's call him "Truckie," pretending that he liked trucks as a boy - leaves his wife and child for another woman. Then a few months later he shows up in church and makes a show of piety, which in this particular church meant raising one's hand during a song.
"Truckie's back with the Lord," someone said. But he wasn't back with his wife, and as I recall he neglected his daughter for the rest of his life. Piece of shit.
Well, that's what put some spice in my disdain for masculine weakness. Thanks again, Simple Man, for marshalling some tremendously important encouragements together.
Thanks for reading Jonathan! Really appreciate it.
Many like Truckie in the world, both within and outside the Church, sadly. That’s a consequence of weak character and weak morality for sure. Appreciate your support and encouragement in sharing a message of true Christian strength and masculinity!
Thank you as well for buying and reading the book, it truly means a lot brother.
Perfectionism is that ever constant whisper in the back of every creator’s mind, constantly judging the finished product. I’ve been a civil contractor for my entire adult life and can still identify every flaw in my work while hearing nothing but praise from the customer. It’s a curse or a blessing depending on your point of view but it’s always there. Enough is enough, indeed. Great article.
Definitely both a blessing and a curse. Whenever I catch myself being overly perfectionist I remind myself of a saying of my father: “Dumb, bold and decisive beats smart and indecisive.” And just commit to finishing and putting it out there, even if I’m not 100% satisfied with the end product (I don’t think you’ll ever be 100% satisfied)
Excellent post. I read it twice. All I would add is perfectionism is always based in shame, not the urge to make something perfect. As you summed up at the end, your perfectionism is rationalizing fear. It is overcoming the fear we must work on.
Incidentally I am writing here on Substack precisely to improve this great failing of mine. I am forcing myself to publish regularly. It helps.
Thank you for writing. That was a great read.
Glad you enjoyed the post brother, and thanks for reading. Just subscribed to your publication, keep up the great work!
Agree on the shame thing, one thing that also helps me to defeat shame is to remember that if something is done with purity of intention (which is why I aim to do), it’s highly likely that it will in fact be valuable to someone else, and in that case it’s only right to share it.
Shame very much dies when using exposure therapy. Face up to the source of the shame and it works wonders.
And thanks for subscribing.
And thank you, Spaceman Spiff, for sleuthing out that ever-present monster shame. It dies a slow death, but kill it we must!
Shame has its place in society. But like any strong force we must be careful since it is destructive.
Especially so with children as shame will bend them out of shape.
Good share, thanks!
My pleasure! Glad you liked it
Good advice and I would add, don’t give up. Giving up is sure failure, whether spending too much time perfecting or not. All that can be adjusted. Knowing when to move on is important. Perfection is impossible as everything man creates at any stage can always be “perfected”. The journey, if not soul satisfying, should be altered to achieve a soul satisfying experience. Then when the nudge is felt to move on, it can be done with peace knowing man’s perfection is unachievable. We are not gods.
Yeah, and sometimes perfectionism is just a fancy way of giving up.
Thank you for reading and supporting! Appreciate you
Ok, i had a bit of trouble with this, and my solution was thus. Perfection is a dead concept, Life IS change. one can observe this all round, the light and time passes. nothing living in time can be perfect as perfection is fixed. it is the ultimate expression of that concept, it is the end, the fulfillment. So a painting, might be perfectly executed, but all my creations are shown to me complete. yet time continues in our perception. basically i threw out perfection as a dead concept and replaced it with a more useful one, a flow of life expression, a vibrancy of moment, of communication love and joy. I do sometimes wait and re write things, if i find an image or a better turn of phrase. But i do not share them with the world, because , i wrote them for me. I think most people are uninterested. my family will enjoy them, i know. I do the same with photo albums. I have a bunch of books actually. not keen on publishing them.
Of course, if you’re not interested in publishing them, then they are finished when they are just written in their entirety. Depends completely on what your intention for your own project is. i like what you said about perfection! Thank you for reading, appreciate it a lot!
Mmm. I have re written several. I am writing for posterity. for my descendants. i will re write them again, especially my herb books, because i want to include greater depth. I have started to put them in poetic form bit by bit, so that it will be harder to edit. like the kallevala or the vedas. i write a poen about every herb with relevant information, and each time is grows more comprehensive and more accurate. unless someone is very skilled, no one will easily corrupt the information and it will be easy to remember for a thousand generations. It is, long term thinking as opposed to what most of us are conditions to settle with. I know my drawings are no longer that of a great master, (i am getting old) but my poetry could outlast the memory of me.
I was told you never finish a project. You just stop working on it.
Great way to put it. Thanks for reading 👊🏻
Very encouraging, and just the kick-in-the-pants that I need. Thanks, Simple Man. You're far more complex than your monicker lets on!
PS I'm enjoying your book, "Christian Vitality". I've had this anecdote to share for weeks now, the remembrance of which you inspired, so never mind planning to post it, here it is for all the world to enjoy:
You make the point that churches can rob a man of his masculinity by not promoting strength of character. Spot on. In my tale, a relative - let's call him "Truckie," pretending that he liked trucks as a boy - leaves his wife and child for another woman. Then a few months later he shows up in church and makes a show of piety, which in this particular church meant raising one's hand during a song.
"Truckie's back with the Lord," someone said. But he wasn't back with his wife, and as I recall he neglected his daughter for the rest of his life. Piece of shit.
Well, that's what put some spice in my disdain for masculine weakness. Thanks again, Simple Man, for marshalling some tremendously important encouragements together.
Cheers.
Thanks for reading Jonathan! Really appreciate it.
Many like Truckie in the world, both within and outside the Church, sadly. That’s a consequence of weak character and weak morality for sure. Appreciate your support and encouragement in sharing a message of true Christian strength and masculinity!
Thank you as well for buying and reading the book, it truly means a lot brother.
God bless you 🙏🏼👊🏻
This article was good but it could have been better😄
Agreed ;)
This was solid
🥂 thanks for reading Levi